LET'S TALK ABOUT SEX BABY.......

Source: Joyreactor.com

Hold it! I know what is going on in your minds but bear with me and just read what i have to say. Before i write on today's topic, i need to say this. I am sometimes skeptical in writing some of my experiences here because i was once told that i talk too much but i am beginning to realise that it is a good thing i write what i go through and the lessons i learn. It is really amazing when someone comes to me or sends a message to me that my post inspired them or they could connect with what i said and it encouraged them. So expect more honesty from me because if i can help one person live a better life then i am achieving God's purpose for my life.

So back to the topic, let's talk about sex. I know I am single and shouldn’t even think about it or talk about it, right? Wrong! I hope to be a Public health Pharmacist and part of public health issues involve human sexuality so unfortunately for the overally prudish type  I have to talk about sex at one time or the other.

I was reading an article on dailymail.co.uk on parents of some children in Bosnia who were angry because their children aged 13-15 came back from an excursion and were pregnant. They were angry at the teachers who were their supervisors on the trip. Here is some parts of the article:

Parents' anger after seven Bosnian schoolgirls aged 13 and 14 fall pregnant on class trip

Seven girls aged between 13 and 14 have fallen pregnant after going on a school trip in Bosnia.

Furious parents are demanding to know why there was such a lack of teacher supervision when the girls, from the town of Banja Luka, returned from a five-day trip to the capital city.

The school had taken 28 girls on the educational outing to Sarajevo to visit museums and other historical sites, but since returning the girls have now reportedly dropped out of lessons.

The case has provoked nationwide discussions about sex education in Bosnia, where the number of sexually active girls aged between 13 and 15 has increased significantly. 

Senad Mehmedbasic, a gynaecologist from Sarajevo said that a growing trend for underage pregnancies in Bosnia is worrying. 

'That is the trend of today. But we cannot continue to allow our children to be educated about sex on the street and not in school,' he added.

Young girls in Bosnia are seeking advice from experts online, the In Serba News Network has reported.  

One schoolgirl wrote: 'I would have sex with my boyfriend, even though I'm only 14... But I am afraid I'll be judged.' 

Last year in Sarajevo 31 underage girls became pregnant but seven out of 28 girls in one five day period has set something of a record.

The National Coordinator for Reproductive Health of the Republika Srpska, Nenad Babici, admitted more children in his country are engaging in sexual relations as early as at age of 13 or 14.

But he didn't blame the teachers for the school trip pregnancy boom - he said it was down to 'parental neglect'.

Source: dailymail.co.uk

This article got me thinking about some issues with sex and sex education. Growing up I knew what sex was heck we used to read harlequin, mills and boons and temptation novels . And I know that a lot of things went down with students in my school but I wasn’t interested (well I was a weird kid and tiny too). However I think part of what prevented me from experimenting was the fact that the ‘you need to have sex to be cool’ line or attitude was not so much in my (our) face(s) then. Nowadays facebook, twitter, instagram and all the millions of social media platform coupled with the way sex is forced down the throats of everyone it is a miracle if a child does not want to experiment with sex by the time he or she is 7. 

To be a virgin by the age of 15 in now as rare as …. I don’t know what to compare it with. In fact I saw an article or is it a film (I am not too sure) on a father and daughter ceremony in which the father gives his daughter a purity ring and she promises that she won’t give her body to any guy until the ring is changed to a wedding ring. Personally I think it is sweet and hope that the father of my kids and my daughters get to do that ceremony but you should see the nasty comments from people. They were of the opinion that the ceremony or the act was stupid. I am like what?! But it really shows that this world has changed.

I remember the first time I knew about ‘the Jonas brothers’ was because someone said their parents gave them purity rings and made them promise to only have sex when it is changed to a wedding ring. How far did that work? I am not sure but I think it was only the eldest who waited till he was married as for the other two it worked till they were 19 or 20 which is a lot better than a 13 year old having sex. So I would say it worked in preventing teen pregnancies for them. I don't know anything about their music but i know about that.

So the fact that children having sex is now the norm, when is the appropriate time to educate them on sex? How do you talk to kids on safe ways to have sex? When do you make them understand that having sex is a responsibility? How do you let them know the consequences of having sex? And at what age should the discussion be held? Whose job is it, the teachers or parents? In the article the parents are blaming the teachers but as for me I blame the parents. The teachers can’t do everything, they are teachers not foster parents.

I am trying to remember if my parents ever talked to me about sex and I don’t think so. I learnt all I know from books and films but I am sure there is a lot that I don’t know which is all good for me. If I know everything now what would happen when I am married....*wink*

And adults (married people) let’s talk about sex. I heard from some people that sex is just for procreation and I was like ‘what in the world?’. Some people are like it is an act that should be endured and not enjoyed. And there is also this opinion that after a certain age or years in marriage that it should be placed in the back burner. I read an article where women in their late 30’s and 40’s were taught the art of seduction and always given assignments on trying out the lessons on their husbands. Personally I think it is cool, some people however thought it was a waste of money. I know that if the classes were held in Nigeria a lot of people would not attend. And I wonder why? Is it much of a taboo to discuss?

While writing this I am contemplating posting it but I decided to do so. Sexuality Education is part of public health and if I can’t discuss it on my blog what would happen when I have to give a talk to children about sex and sexual behaviours? So I have decided to give myself a jumpstart and start the discussion with you guys. 

But as for me giving the sex talk to my kids, I don’t think I can. I think I would get a friend whose ideas are similar to my own to talk to them. I believe they might listen to the person better than me. Because sometimes we always believe our parents are old school and don’t know what they are saying. Then again I don’t know what would happen at that time so till I get to that bridge I would know how to cross it. 

I would really love to get feedback from you all. So guys, let's talk about sex......

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Luv ya,

Petite Diva