Hey guys, I really don’t feel inspired to write on anything particular but I want to write so as to kick this laziness or is it writer’s block that I am experiencing. Therefore this entry would be a load of unrelated thoughts in my head as of now. Scaaaarrrryyyy? Uhn?
Just finished watching the movie ‘Battleship’ and I am in total awe of all navy guys (and gals). For those who don’t know, I am a navy gal for LIFE. I can’t state when I fell in love with the navy but I think it was probably in secondary school. Watching the movie has made me appreciate what naval personnel do. Imagine fighting an enemy at sea. When they attack your ship, where do you run to?……water? The army guys can hide somewhere on land, the air force have parachutes and mostly would land on the ground. But the navy……?
I have been having some issues lately in my personal life because as you all know ‘he’ is in the military but watching the movie has uhmmm made me feel that I ain’t cutting him enough slack. I recently read a comment about it taking a strong woman to date or marry a military guy and I didn’t understand it until now. I am battling with so many things that I feel that I have the energy to fight any other thing or should I say conquer any other issue after these issues. I feel that if God gave me the strength to conquer the ‘issues’, God would definitely give me the strength to conquer other issues.
My mum has always believed that you should never watch a movie just for entertainment, that you should learn something from it. And she is so right, I might have issues implementing what I learned but I think I would try to understand when problems come up and cut him some slack. But I ain’t going to be some door mat! Oh No! I am still going to be as fierce and spirited as I am but I would try to learn to be more forgiving and try not to break his head when he messes up.
Well, that is all about me, battleship and ‘Him’. Today (19/07/12) was the commendation service for my HOD (I know I should say late but I can’t) and I cried again. The burial service holds tomorrow, the 20th. I would be honest. I DON’T WANT TO GO TO THE BURIAL SERVICE!!! And I am not because I was drafted to remain behind at the pharmacy. I feel relieved because I really don’t want to break down again; I don’t want to see her body being lowered into the ground. I feel like she is still alive and I want to keep feeling like that. Going to the burial service/ceremony would replace that feeling because when I feel she is alive, I would have that memory of seeing her being lowered into the ground. I guess I am acting strange but that is the way I feel.
I just can’t go. I have a feeling that I might break down, faint or choke there.
Well, I guess I have written a bit today. It feels good to write again. I hope I would be able to write on something interesting tomorrow. I hope you were not bored with this write up. Thanks for reading….
P.S: I am super excited that I discovered that I could shop online and they can send some products to Nigeria. Could I have found my second source of income? Hmmmmmm, don’t know. Let’s us wait and see…